NBA Team forced to Cancel Promotion for being Racist

 In NaBA

Just as Black History Month rolls to an end, an NBA team has come under fire recently for a blatantly racist and ill conceived promotion. 

The Sacramento Kings were forced to cancel a promotion mid-game earlier this week when one of it’s players noticed they were firing plain black t-shirts out of a t-shirt gun¹. The player whom we’ll refer to as “Our Cousin”, looked up into the stands during a time out and noticed the atrocity. He then benched himself, despite his team leading by 2 points midway through the 4th quarter, and refused to re-enter the game until the promotion was disbanded and an apology was issued. 

The Kings, not wanting to offend “the Cuz” (It’s only true Star and Franchise player), decided to immediately cancel the promotion. They then proceeded to pause the game and have a local choir sing a moving rendition of Amazing Grace as an apology and tribute to Black History Month. Unfortunately it was an all white choir which only served to further infuriate “our cousin”. He stormed off the court and has decided to no longer play for the Kings until they “get their shit together”. 

A person close² to “the Cuz” had this to say; “I mean, can you believe the Kings?!? BLACK t-shirts during Black History Month? What the hell were they thinking?!?” and “Then to top it ALL off they were SHOOTING them out of GUNS?!?!? I mean, how insanely racially insensitive can you get?!? This is the kind of thing that could spark race riots” 

This will likely mean the end of “the Cuz’s” tenure with the Kings as they will almost certainly be forced to trade him, it’s very hard to come back from something like this. A team official who requested to be off the record for obvious reasons had this to say; “Maybe we’ll trade him to the Clippers, an organization that has a rich history in treating it’s African American players with the utmost respect and dignity, could be useful for some perspective” 

No matter how this turns out, it’s truly a black eye for both the team and the league. ³

  1. OH THE HORROR!!!… Not a T-Shirt gun!!! It’s soooooo symbolic
  2. A person close to… not close to… beside him… may have once seen him on TV… hard to say really…
  3. Sukker Punch would like to pre-emptively apologize to Demarcus Cousins for the racially insensitive use of the term “Black Eye” during Black History Month.
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